[Played by /u/Melazu]

A friendly, albeit erratic, cat lady. She often talks using abstruse technical jargon, and has frequent gaps in her memory.

She is currently in the process of investigating her department. While there are old records indicating its existence, it does not seem to currently exist within the facility.


Melanie was found in a storage closet, already wearing a badge with her name and department. Her memory of anything before this moment is entirely blank, although she somehow already possessed some knowledge about the Facility and her department. Melanie did not physically exist before this point, but rather existed as a theoretical concept before being "thought-formed" by an employee in her department. However, there is no record of any employee having done so.



Melanie was human when she was discovered, but expressed interest in being a cat, and was transformed into an anthro by Y1ff shortly afterwards.

Demon Vault (Story Arc)

Melanie met up with the real Vault and worked together with him to capture the demon who had taken his form, but then the timeline collapsed ((read: a different person's thread was chosen as canon)). She felt woozy from being shunted to a different timeline in which her recent actions hadn't taken place, and went to her office to take a nap. Unfortunately, she ended up getting lost on her floor, and couldn't find the elevator back up to where the action was happening.

Dream (Story Arc)

After spending a few weeks lost in the facility and eating nothing but cafeteria pizza, a handsome man by the name of Archibald Sodium showed up on her floor, and he helped her find the elevator. They exchanged numbers, and started dating soon after. Their first date was at Luna's Party. During the giant mech attack, Archie healed her using a magic guitar after she had been wounded by flying shrapnel.


Thus far, Melanie has demonstrated five "abilities".


Melanie has a proclivity for being unusually lucky. She often narrowly avoids dangerous situations by accident, frequently wins games of chance, and generally manages to be in just the right place at the right time.


Melanie has an innate, intuitive sense of probability. She instinctively knows the odds of various outcomes occurring, within an incredibly small margin of error.

Quantum Stable

Total non-interaction with spatial anomalies, such as portals. Her body passes through them as if they are not there. When explaining this phenomenon, Melanie describes herself as simply having "an unusually stable wave function".

Thought Bubbling

A technology she discovered among the bits of research left behind from the Department of Theoretical Practice. By concentrating on a small to medium-sized object, she can convert it into a theoretical construct in her mind, and convert it back into a physical object at will by focusing on it and "popping" the thought bubble. It functions as a form of storage, with the added risk that items can only be recovered if they are remembered.

Bubbled Items

Thought Forming

Using early prototype technology developed by the Department of Theoretical Practice, Melanie can create virtually anything by "thinking" it into existence. However, this ability comes with limitations. Unless a natural 20 is rolled on creation, the object can be dispelled whenever it is closely observed. Squinting (or optically zooming in the case of robots) at the object will collapse its waveform, and it will cease to exist. It can be used to make large quantities of something, as well, but dispelling one will dispel all of them. This technology also cannot be used to create the same thing twice. Once a theoretical construct manifests, if it disappears, it is gone forever. (Melanie can create one of something, or five of something, but can't make one of something five times in a row.) The "blacklist" persists across alternate timelines and multiple users, and Melanie won't know something is on the blacklist unless she remembers making it or tries (and fails) to make it.

Thought Forming Blacklist

  • [20] Human Being - Melanie was formed using this technology, on a perfect roll. As such, she will not be dispelled upon close observation.
  • [15] Robotic Exosuit (Dispelled) - In an alternate timeline, Melanie formed this in an attempt to disguise Vault (/u/VaultRaider112) from the demon who had taken his form. The demon saw through the deception, however, and it was dispelled.


Melanie's "office" is really just the room where she keeps all the things she's collected around the Facility. Her hoard currently contains: