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Department of Experimental Experiments

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The Department of Experimental Experiments is the section of the facility concerned with doing the science everyone else thinks is too dangerous or stupid to attempt. 

History

The Department was formed at an unknown point in the past, and has had at least four department heads. The first, known only as Barry, died in early 2013 in a freak accident involving grenades. His successor died in late 2013 in a freak accident involving vending machines and plasma guns. The third leader, known only as Avengier_Than_Thou , was the first to actually communicate reguarly with the rest of the facility. Additionally, the Department has recently assumed security responsibilities throughout the facility, due to a lack of security personnel.  

In early 2014, the Department assumed the roles of the Department of Security and Maiming , and much later was blown up in a freak accident involving ten tons of Dynamite. Avengier has converted Sector 5 of the facility into the new headquarters of his two departments. In late March 2014, Sector 5 was sent into space and returned in April via the ocean.

Following the Vending Machine Rebellion Avengier was forcibly removed from command. The Vending Machines appointed Rob the Evil Intern as the puppet ruler of Experimental Experiments. After a short civil war, Avengier reclaimed Experimental Experiments but not Security and Maiming.  

Creations

  • The Nuclear Earthquake Device - missing
  • The Dumb Grenades - currently stored in the Department of Experimental Experiments
  • The Hypertaser Megalaser Accelerator Launcher - a WMD currently stored in the Department of Experimental Experiments
  • The [REDACTED] cannon - a big gun that fires [REDACTED]. Currently only half finished. 
  • The 14-Series experiments
    • 14a - gained sentience, rebelled and was killed by Avengier_Than_Thou. Later restored to life and became President of the Galaxy.
    • 14b - joined 14a and was killed by Avengier_Than_Thou
    • 14c - missing
    • 14d - joined 14a and was killed by Avengier_Than_Thou
    • 14e - joined 14a and was killed by ReclaimerSpirit
    • 14f - joined 14a and was killed by Avengier_Than_Thou
    • 14g - joined 14a and was killed by Avengier_Than_Thou
    • 14h - failed
    • 14i - currently stored in the Department of Experimental Experiments
    • 14j - failed
    • 14k - failed
    • 14l - survived 14a's rebellion but was killed by honorguard42
    • 14m - currently stored within the Department of Experimental Experiments
    • 14n - joined 14a and was killed by ReclaimerSpirit
  • The 15-Series experiments
    • 15a to ξ - stored in the Department of Experimental Experiments
  • Anti-Age Shenanigan System  - Destroyed in the destruction of the old Department. 
  • Operation: Brain Scan - [REDACTED]
  • Operation: More Power - [REDACTED]
  • The Zerx Detector - destroyed in the destruction of the old Department.
  • The Goggles That Do Something - experimental
  • Operation: All Your Base Are Belong To Us - failed
  • Operation: Someone Set Us Up The Bomb - ongoing
  • A cure for the common cold - failed
  • Schroedinger's Dynamite - successful
  • The Infinite Alien theory - states that when infinite aliens are given infinite bricks they will eventually build the pyramids
  • Operation: Robot Cops - cancelled due to lack of co-operation from the Detroit police department
  • Personal Explosive Reactive Armour harness - experimental
  • Slowing down the Speed of Sound - completely accidental. Experiment is not to be repeated.
  • Nuclear weapon tests in the basement - banned from doing those
  • Resonance Cascade Device: destroyed because headcrabs are terrifying
  • Operation: Use Lego to Seal up the Time Holes - successful
  • Operation: Hulk - Doctor Banner has been missing since August 2014
  • Operation: [CLASSIFIED] - it went fine until [REDACTED]
  • A safe way to extrac- never mind.
  • VoicesDontStop 2.0 - awesome, but dead.
  • Time travel - resulted in Avengier becoming POTUS
  • Operation: Stop Tod - [REDACTED]

The Department of Experimental Experiments assures all involved that everything this Department does is probably ethical. 

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